So many people who see my story posts or have been touched by my first blog post have reached out to me. Let’s recap where I’ve been. At the start of the 2018 year, God had been dealing with me in so many ways it wasn’t even funny. Then out of the blue, someone drops into my life that I never expected to be there. I got into a relationship when I wasn’t WHOLE yet. So with that being said, I made mistakes along the way which led to a huge train wreck. I allowed past “situationships to hold a place in my heart.” Those old situationships allowed so much distruction to happen, that it totally put me into a place where I became bitter and angry with so many people. Even when I let something good get torn to pieces, it was as if it needed to happen in order for me to regain my focus. God is showing me that he has to break me all the way down in order to build me into the woman of God that I am becoming. I was offered a position in a whole new city where I know NO ONE. This is a time for me to focus on myself and God. I’ve learned so much more about myself that I ever knew. I’m using my gifts that he has given me, and I don’t regret it one bit. In order for God to use you, you’ve got to go through something and I can truly say that this year was a BREAK DOWN for a BUILD UP. I thank God for using me in my everyday life to be a light for others. If you would’ve asked me in early 2018 did I believe in true friendships with longevity, I would’ve said HECK NO! Now, I can truly say that at this age, for the first time in life God sent me a circle of women who are wise and are filled with the love of Jesus Christ. The first woman that I met is much like an older sister to me. The first day I met her, she was filled with the love of Jesus I could just tell. We talked about normal things that we were doing this summer and then the conversation went from that to biblical things. She told me that everything that I dream about or write about isn’t a coincidence. I was like “OMG-how does she know?” in my head. At that moment I knew that God sent her. I had been praying that God would send me some God fearing people into my life to help me grow. I always felt like everyone was out to hurt you, or at least they would show their true colors in due time so I never let my guard down with anyone. Even if you felt like I let my guard down, I’m pretty sure I played games with you to see what you would do with whatever conversation I’d give you. Now, my mindset is so different. If I hurt you in the past, I apologize. There are Godly people in the world that are assigned to you and they will love on you like Christ. I found an amazing church home and I love it! There are so many “firsts” happening right now I don’t even know where to begin. I’ve never really had my own church home. You know you usually go where your parents go and so forth, but to have an actual connection to a church that you feel is mind blowing. Having a relationship with Jesus is about YOU+HIM! It has nothing to do with anyone else. I’m a long way from the person that I used to be and that’s only because of the BLOOD. I’m in the state where I’m only focused on the WORK BEING DONE! If God didn’t tell me you’re apart of the process, then I guess I’ll see ya next lifetime! The only way from here is up. :)
Father God I thank you for allowing me to have the ability to be transparent and open with my readers. I thank you for every young woman or male that will feel as though they are at their breaking point, but by reading this message they feel a little closer to you. God I thank you for restoration and renewing of the mind. This year is not over and we will continue to see miracles and a shift in different areas of our lives. Father I come against any battle with suicide, depression, and even anxiety. It is because of you that we are here and we can overcome any battle that is not of you. Lord, place a hedge of protection over any young woman or man that is not secure of themselves or even have feelings of being lost in life. I ask that you cover them in your blood and allow your Holy Spirit to comfort them at all times. God, I ask that you break any soul ties that are hindering any of your children from being the best version of themselves to be broken. I ask that you pour out your blessings and continue to show your light and love upon all who read this prayer.